Friday, May 30, 2008

Comfort Can Be Pretty

So often women fight against fashion and style because they like to be comfortable. Good for you, do you want a cookie? Guess what? Everyone likes to be comfortable, everyone. Every person on this earth wants to be comfortable when they get dressed. No one gets in the morning and goes oh man, I cannot wait to put on some constrictive, tight, binding clothes. Yes! Corset time, tie it tighter dammit I don’t want to feel remotely comfortable. While we’re at it why don’t I just put on a straitjacket and stripper heels. Oh, delicious restraint and discomfort. Please dear God get me out of this disgusting comfort of my pajamas. I’m wrapping myself head to toe in an ace bandage until I lose circulation, God willing I’ll lose a toe today.

Do you get it?

Again, you are not special for wanting to be comfortable and it does not excuse you from actually getting dressed in the morning. The next time I see someone out and about during the day in pajama bottoms and t-shirt (who is not a college student going to a 9am class) or some ratty ass sweats I will run you over with my car. Seriously, I’ll do it. No fashionable jury in the world would convict me. Look, if I have to get up and get dressed in traditional clothes every day so do you. If you want to wear “comfy” clothes every day become a doctor or nurse and wear scrubs all day, the rest of you need something else. And no, you can’t wear all scrubs all day I did not just okay them for the entire populace.

Okay, so you’re into this comfort thing that you believe the rest of the world hates so, what to do? Well, the answer to that depends on what you do all day. If you happen to work from home (in any capacity not just Mommy’s stay home anymore there is a whole new culture of folks working out of their homes doing all kinds of jobs) clearly your dress code is less strict. However, that does not give you a pass to dress like a hobo (by the way there is no hobo pass except for actual hobos). I will actually give you people your sweats but in something that isn’t disgusting and that you wouldn’t feel shame running an errand in. May I suggest yoga pants, fitted t-shirt and fitted zip up hoodie? That is a cute look that totally says “fashionable lady on the go”, however do not, do not go matchy matchy the days of the terry cloth head to toe sweat outfit is dead. You need to do a yoga pant in soft cotton in a basic color (navy, grey, black, brown) then a complementary top and a complementary hoodie if needed. Again this is a comfortable outfit that will bring no shame on a Target run.

Okay so what about you folks who go to a regular office every day? Have you met regular pants? You do know that you can find pretty much anything and everything in 100% cotton nowadays, right? I personally only like to wear cotton clothes because they are comfortable I believe cotton could make a ball gown super comfy, but that’s just me. So back to you, you look for fabrics that are cotton with stretch that is going to be really comfortable because it’s going to fit like sweats but still be tailored and look polished. I would say go for the same thing with your tops look for all cotton tops with some stretch. What makes sweats et al so comfortable is that they move with your body and are not restrictive. You will find the exact same thing with stretch cotton clothing. You will be shocked at how comfortable a dress can be when its stretch cotton, believe me.

What I think turns people off from “real” clothes is the idea of fake fibers and no stretch. Man made fiber like polyester is not comfortable and tends to make people sweat or just not feel good. Any natural fabric (wool, linen, cotton, silk) will feel comfortable against your skin and will not feel restrictive. The idea is to elevate what you already love which is why I’m suggesting starting with cotton clothing since that is closest to sweats.

I think that shopping for comfort has come a long way. You can find all sorts of things that are going to fit well, be fitted and feel comfortable. Like I said avoid unnatural fibers and rigid fabric and you will feel like a new woman.

There has been a revolution in the comfy clothing and shoe world. Designers get that women want to be comfortable while still appearing stylish and chic. Shoe companies make comfortable foot loving shoes that look well, hot. You can get sky high wedges, boots and all sorts of fun things that will treat your feet lovely and look gorgeous.

Designers are choosing empire waists with light, flowy fabrics over drop waists and skin tight fits. Wide leg pants are bashing down skinny legged pants. The more American women demand to be listened to the more designed will actually start to listen.

Who is really in charge in this relationship to begin with? Huh? If we don’t buy or embrace all styles they will have to do better. We are the consumers and should dictate trends not a bunch of anorexic, snooty fashionistas. Those idiots will wear anything anyway they are in no way shape or form objective. They would wear over the knee boots with a tulle skirt and a stuffed monkey as a hat. Their opinion no longer matters. It’s the rest of us going “A stuffed monkey hat? Really?”. We get the vote.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Seriously? No One Wants Some Pie?

What has been the accepted norm is that girls under size 6 get the choicest pieces of apparel while the rest of us flounder. People who make clothes need to accept that women come in all shapes and sizes and heavy women don’t want to disappear they want to dress well just like anyone else. What’s worse is that the clothes they make in larger sizes are just an expanded version of a size zero sample – bastards. They never have consideration for body shape they basically give a size 12 a giant size 0 and gals wonder why clothes look so bad on.

I think what they do is deplorable. Models should eat and all be at least a size 8. I think if designers had any talent they would love to dress curves. It’s easy to make something look good on a hanger but on a real woman THAT is a sign of a real gift. It’s just a big joke. In this country of abundance people starve themselves, why? In other countries people would kill for the availability of food we have. We really only accept one standard of beauty because it has been shoved down our throats. If all of sudden designers started making larger sizes proportioned right and began using models that looked like real woman we would all change our mind about what is beautiful. Fashion and style are not unobtainable anymore. Practically every woman can look fashionable and sophisticated without a high price tag. This idea that fashion is not for the masses is antiquated and frankly stupid.

Hot designers now design for Target for God’s sake. That’s high fashion for everyone. It’s time we saw all of that reflected. I’m personally starving for real women. I want to hear magazines tout the latest celebrity fad, eating real food and not dieting! Headline reads “Paris Hilton Gained 20lbs…That’s HOT. Read How She Did It Inside!” or how about “Cupcakes! The New Fad Sweeping Hollywood!”. How awesome would that be?

We are a nation obsessed with eating disorders. We are obsessed with overeaters, under eaters, those losing weight, those gaining weight. Jesus, whatever happened to just loving yourself and occasionally having a piece of cake and feeling okay with it?

No one here wants to change you or modify you or force you to fit into some neat little niche. Look if you don’t like something but Glinda says it’s great for you that’s fine its totally okay. You are allowed to make decisions and choices here. This is a place where we can full suspend reality for a little while and pretend that real women drive the retail world (oh wait that’s real isn’t it) that most of the time when you walk into a store you are hard pressed to find a size over 8 (oh wait that’s real too) and that plus size stores are popping up all over and that most major retailers are adding plus sized clothes to their stores too (oh wait that’s real too). Its time that we all had a voice and decided that we have had enough with what everyone expects of us or thinks of us. Its important that we stand up and say I shop, I am not a size 0 and I deserve to be counted. And seriously, who wants pie? Its bakery fresh. That’s what I thought.

Site Meter